Hey You !

Have been meaning to write this for a while - without sarcasm. But it is kind of difficult....to write about love then and now !  And watching Dilwale past midnight makes me think of mindlessness...... about that crazy little thing called love :P  Then  Strange that I found you in the most unlikely of all the places - in the pages of memory . You were surprised that I remembered your address How many cigarettes you smoked And how your eyes crinkled in a smile.... And how you kissed and I cried .. When we said goodbye ... Now  Stage 1. Level 1 She smiles. He likes. She likes.    He loves. She loves . He pretends.            Game over  Stage 2. Level 2 He stalks. She stalks. He pretends. She pretends. He confesses. She confesses. He loves. She loves. He leaves.She loves.          Game over. Stage 3 Level 3 He loves. She pretends. He loves. She likes. He proposes. She asks for time......           PAUSE !  And then he opens his arms  Shahrukh Khan style

I live with pain these days - literally ! My knees, my joints , my wrist , my heart .... it's not a happy existence , but I live through it all- partying , movies , friends, reunions , award ceremonies, limping through and not giving in to the different degrees of pain. 2015 has been a year of goodbyes- Too many of them . Mostly painful - some had to be that way and a few conscious. Saying goodbye , or partial goodbye to work has been a conscious decision. People around me think I am too young to quit, give up on the money - sustain my lifestyle and live with this doing- nothing- asking -for -nothing mode. I do not know it myself - it's just another experiment , another mid life blue , when I do not want to run with the time, after moolah and after expectations! Tall order that - but I see life with it's sell by date is passing me by. At times I ask myself what do I live for ? And I realize I did not do so much cos I was waiting for the right time and it never happened.