in search of happiness....

In search of a happy blog :-) !

Many reasons to feel happy- a passed test, prayers answered and Mainak's most eligible bachelor getting married ( breaking hearts?)

Chibu is a tad unhappy , though I am sure pretty excited about his 'guru' tying the knot- unhappy cos the time is divided now !

Bhaskar seemed happy that "shitkaal" has finally arrived in Kolkata and I am sure the mellow sunlight and the blankets are casting their magic. The fleeting charm, thus much loved.

Kochi is still warm, though the evenings are pleasant and I have enough of me- time watching movies, developing content and reading. Bhaskar asks how I pass my time without anything to dust? Well my OCD is phenomenal!

Coming back to happiness - a lot is speculated and defined and debated.

What makes you happy ? - A moment , an event , a surprise , a fulfillment factor , the divine or the myriad mystical magical moorings of life ?

Bhaskar always tells me to look beneath when I crib and crab- and count on what I

have in life and not what I have missed ! Difficult , but true - there is so much to feel good about - I have been lucky in many ways.

I still have preserved my tattered sweat shirt , my comfort zone of security - something I want to throw out but cannot coz it feels good against my skin despite being an unbearable sight :-)

Ah life is like that too - feels good despite the undesired and the undesirable - they too are in my corner - variation in the hues of happiness .... Life is stable ! Amen to that !

"You may feel comfortable bobbing around in the little lake that you’re used to, but if you don’t stretch your comfort zone and venture out into the adjoining waterways, you’ll never discover the beauty and immensity of the ocean – you will never even know it exists. Holding on to what’s comfortable may be the very reason you often feel like something is missing in your life.

Remember, just because you venture out into the world doesn’t mean you can’t return home whenever you want to. It’s okay to come back to where you started, but it’s NOT OKAY to never leave." (Read Start: Punch Fear in the Face.)

Comments

A holiday with self :)

A long overdue blog about the path that I was seeking , or did the path seek me out ? Over the years the sheen of belief was wearing off and I was beginning to question the master about the magic - about faith becoming commercial, about what Bhaskar stated, "This is all about money". Packing my bags off and going solo isn't very uncommon in my life, but this time I was not on work per se. Checking-in into the Ashram, was on my bucket-list for ever-since, and it was an amazing experience. Despite the crowd, the ambiance just reverberated with a mix of reverence, energy , faith, hope, prayer - and questions too ! Like I mentioned before meditation was not about spiritual pyrotechnics, but a metaphor connected to life. Like the corner I chose had a vantage view of the stage and despite a stench that started emanating from the corner, I just could not leave that place, for the view that corner offered got me stuck there. Life is like that, we are often stuck in the rut , ...

The 3 men in my life!

That's a strange caption I chose ! But for me, am in a sentimental nostalgic mood - It's not easy for me to watch, as the first man around whom my world revolved stumble, totter and be spaced out ! Of course his spirit is still strong and I ensure that he is never left alone or lonely ,but I guess I can't...in the end he is alone with his thoughts! Of course I am talking of Baba ! He still is my priority at times over Bhaskar , who suffers silently . Baba and Bhaskar can still be jealous over each other when I buy something for one and leave the other out. So it has been a habit now to buy 2 identical things for the two, cos I know they will end up comparing ! The third one is going to be 21 in two days time ! And aren't I glad that he has grown up ! I was not really the best of smoochie-woochie -baby -talkie mothers ! I guess that's the reason why Chibu still feels embarrassed when hugged ! But at times I am amazed that 21 years flew by...I still can remember ...

Morning bells are ringing ......

Heidi lived in Alps with her Alms uncle - I read this story in a book that was called The Big Big Story Book and it had a compilation of amazing stories that were my first foray into the world of English story books. Recently on a long flight I watched the movie much to delight of the young steward who was our attendant that night. My first glimpse of the Alps was from our flight ...the dawn breaking to spread the orange hues over the snowy terrain...looked mesmerizing even to someone who is not too fond of the mountains. Switzerland was beautiful, with its manicured terrain and flowers like pretty maids all in a row, picture perfect setting and breathtaking, like a touch me not porcelain beauty. Coming from my "elo melo" city I wondered how people managed to keep a country so organized , I have trouble keeping my room in ship shape...... No, I would not like to live there ......it's too distant and too cold ,but what I will carry in my heart is the awesome time .......

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